If the shoe fits...

Ouch. Ever since I attended the God Save My Shoes melee and was told that the highest you could go up on your foot without tumbling over was 5 inches, I wanted to try it out. Somewhere between Black Friday and Cyber Monday, Shana and I were out and about when I spotted these big, black, beautiful babies. Some fancy designer, marked way down, I shoved my feet in and tried to walk. My right foot was so cramped it didn't move, so I had to sort of limp on the good one. It seemed like these had at least a 6 inch heel, and with the 1 or so inch platform, I was ready for my test.

Total failure. It felt like I was on top of a skyscraper with the wind rushing my back, as I tried to force my body back to avoid falling over the side. I made it two steps. By then, the shoes were almost glued to my feet and I couldn't kick them off, so I bent my knees, squatted, and somehow, totally sans grace, thank God I was way in the back in the clearance section, got down on my butt and used both hands to get them off.

Stunning move, not seen in the film.