Circle of Life

And then there were two. Well...not so fast. Shana hit the road to Tucson this morning, sophomore year in college here she comes. We had a great summer, lots of travel - saw so many new countries and some of the same old summer stomping grounds, a month of Leadership Workshop, plus lots of movies and hanging around lazy days, too. I wasn't ready for her to leave. It came up so fast. I still want to worry and help and advise and crack up. I still want to mother. But, careful what you wish for, because today I had to be Mom to my Mom before, during and after her knee replacement surgery following years of tennis and skiing and gardening and walking around in high heels. I was her eyes, ears and mouthpiece. I was her Power of Attorney and holder of the purse as she turned over the keys to the kingdom. All of the forms and the doctors and the nurses and the beeping and the making sure that the X got put on the right (the RIGHT, RIGHT, not the left) leg didn't give me much time to wallow about Shana, about the empty nest, about the "who am I now" thoughts, just happy to see her "here i am" text after finishing her drive down I-10. But then it hit me. As Shawn and I were walking out of the hospital, through the same doors we walked through 18 years ago with little two day old Shana, it all came back. She's gone. And then there were two.